Photography: OneThousandWords
Torn between attending your former beau's wedding or just quickly bowing out entirely? Most people seem to think that it is easier not to invite the ex (or exes), but this is not as uncommon as you would think. Prince William and Kate Middleton's royal wedding in 2011 saw the attendance of both the prince's ex-girlfriends and Kate's rumoured former boyfriends. Receiving an invite to your ex's wedding can be rather stressful, so take some time to mull over the pros and cons before you RSVP to the invitation.
You should attend because you can…
… show your ex (and everyone else) that you have truly moved on.
This is someone you were emotionally connected to at some point in your life and you would not have received an invitation if your ex has not absolutely moved on. Attending the wedding will also show that you are mature and happy for him or her (even if you are not). Even if the both of you parted on awkward terms, be the bigger person by attending and speaking to both the groom and the bride during the special occasion.
… support your ex as a loyal friend.
Not all breakups are ugly, and you may still be on good, friendly terms with your ex. Showing support by attending his or her wedding is a great thing to do. Just remember to return the favour by extending an invitation for your own wedding!
… get to know more people at the wedding and even a potential date!
This is especially true for huge weddings! Every gathering is an opportunity for you to get out of your comfort zone and meet someone new. Attend the wedding with an open mind, and you may just find a new friend to accompany you to coffee after.
… show him (or her) just how hot you look.
Just because it's someone else's wedding doesn't mean you can't put on a really good dress or suit and show yourself off. While you should not be monopolising any attention away from the bride and groom of the day, looking great and attending your ex's wedding will surely give your self-esteem a boost.
However, you should also consider…
… being struck with bittersweet memories.
Experts say that it is challenging to return to the point where you both were just friends after having a relationship together. You should think about how you feel about your ex currently, even if the both of you split up years ago. If there is the slightest hint that you attending the wedding doesn't feel right, then excusing yourself will be the best decision for you.
… feeling awkward when guests start to gossip.
For wedding filled with families, relatives and friends, the gossip mill is sure to run amok as there is nothing juicier than an ex attending the bride and groom's wedding. You may feel embarrassed of this negative attention, especially when all attention should be on the beautiful bride and groom. The couple will want all eyes to be on them, so if your presence will cause a stir, perhaps it is best to reconsider your RSVP.
… getting lonely when you turn up without a plus-one.
Turning up at the wedding with a date is your best option, but if you don't have one or the invite doesn't include a plus-one, chances are you are going to feel both lonely and envious on the day itself. If this is the case, attending the wedding will be more stressful than anything else.
… ending up making a scene.
Wedding celebrations go hand in hand with drinks and if you are not careful, you may end up drinking a little too much. With your inhibitions lowered, saying hurtful or inappropriate things you otherwise would not say if you were sober will be embarrassing to yourself and the newlyweds.
