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When you have been married for quite some time it is no secret that the relationship can eventually feel a bit boring. Everything you both seem to do as a couple begin to turn into a routine that although can feel good at times, other times can feel downright tedious. One of the 'this is getting boring' routines that couples often find themselves in is their sex life. It is very easy to fall into a rut when it comes to sex because couples often end up looking at it as just an 'obligation' or 'something we just have to do' therefore the passion and excitement tends to die down overtime. When it comes to sex, it isn't about how often you and your partner make love, but it is about the connection, excitement and passion you both share when you are experiencing it. It is normal to feel bored however with a bit of effort there are plenty of practical things you both can do, which can truly make a difference in your sex life and make it a lot spicier and feel less like a 'job'. Here are 10 full proof tips that can help turn your sex life around:
1. Tell and show your husband how badly you want him. One of the biggest turn on for a man is knowing how much he is wanted by his partner. Let him know how much you desire him by sending him 'naughty' texts in the middle of the day and telling him what you would like to do to him when he gets home. Receiving these texts at a random time of the day will really get him excited and also motivates him to think of ways he can excite you in return.
2. Figure out what your routine is when it comes to sex and break that pattern! Some couples fall into a rut when it comes to either their sex positions, the time of the day they tend to have sex and/or where they usually have sex (i.e. the bedroom). Once you both find the pattern you already have – try and break it by doing something different. This is already going to bring a bit of excitement because the smallest of changes in your routine will trigger a new experience.
3. Show affection regardless where you both are. Don't just limit your sexual expression with each other for only when you are about to have sex. Show how much you are attracted to him by showing a bit of public display of affection. When you are out and about, hold his hands, touch his thighs (subtly!), kiss his cheeks or give him a nice hug! The more you show affection outside of the act of sex the more the sexual connection becomes stronger and easier to trigger in the bedroom.
4. Show him what you got by doing a bit of 'peep show'! Men are very visual so it helps if you show your partner a bit more skin at times when he less expects it. Strut around in just your bra and underwear while you're doing household chores or brushing your teeth. If that feels too much for you then you can begin by sending him sexy pictures throughout the day. This will not only turn him on but it also shows that you are proud and confident about your sexuality, which will make him desire you more.
5. Locations, locations, locations! Try making love in places you normally wouldn't. This is regardless if you both already change up the locations or not – try to think of more places you both have yet to have sex. You don't necessarily even have to leave the house, try making love in different parts of your home. The weirder the place, the more exciting it may feel.
6. Sex always seems to be more fun on vacations or in a hotel room – so visit a hotel and book a room! Try and re-create that vacation vibe by staying in a hotel (it doesn't have to be a super luxurious one either) and open up that bottle of wine or champagne to make you both feel a bit more relaxed. Being in a hotel room brings out the vibe that you are both there just to be with each other with no distractions whatsoever.
7. Speak up about what you want. As women we often tend to focus on what our partner wants in the bedroom and neglect our sexual needs and desires. Well, that will not help spice things up, ladies – it is time to be more open and let him know what you want for a change. Tell your partner what turns you on about what he does the most, for instance, "It turns me on when you touch my neck." You will receive more of what you like but it will also boost his confidence and make him want to please you even more. It's a win-win situation!
8. Add some props into the mix! Try experimenting with different tools such as handcuffs, whips, blind folder, and/or whipped cream. You don't have to go all out at the first try if it's way too intimidating. Ask each other what sort of small tool would be nice to use in the bedroom. You both can explore together and make it a little bit more personal.
9. Give your man a strip tease or a lap dance! Now, this might seem a bit more intimidating than the rest of the tips above however, when you are feeling sexy and confident with yourself – doing this for your man will really drive him crazy (in a good way). A man loves his woman to be a 'lady in the street but a freak in the bed' – well this would be your chance to give him exactly that. Don't forget to have fun with it – it's not supposed to be that serious.
10. Role-plays! This one could be endless because you both can literally re-create the whole entire experience of sex. Don't be scared to let each other know what 'roles' or 'scenarios' you both want to play out in the bedroom. Even if the role-plays start to feel a bit stale – change the story around and even add costumes into the mix to spice things up a bit more. You will see each other in different lights and you will feel butterflies in your stomach once again.
